


The wizard's sounds

by Mycroffed



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Also some angst towards the end, Canon Timeline, Canon post episode 26, Does this go somewhere, M/M, Some Widomauk fluff, This is kind of a character study I guess, as usual, fuck titles, spoilers for episode 26
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-13
Updated: 2019-02-13
Packaged: 2019-10-27 17:04:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17770784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mycroffed/pseuds/Mycroffed
Summary: It was almost never quiet around Caleb.--~--An observation of some of the noises the wizard makes around the Mighty Nein.





	The wizard's sounds

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to go somewhere. I had a brilliant idea last night, but then my laptop did a thing and I couldn't write until today and besides the first few lines, most of the idea had already left me. It ended up more of a collection of small drabbles more than anything else.
> 
> Hope you like it anyway!

It was never quiet around Caleb.

The wizard tried his damnest to hide it, but Beau caught up quite fast. The first time she noticed was briefly after they had met, when they had first taken to the road. All of them had been getting ready to go to sleep – the monk herself had unrolled her bedroll and was getting comfortable on it, glancing around at the group of ragtag volunteers in need of a shower she had been travelling with. She was a little more familiar with Fjord and Jester, the half-orc and tiefling she had bumped into before arriving in Trostunwald, but the others?

She didn’t exactly felt able to relax just yet. Especially the wizard and his goblin companion seemed to be shady and out of all of them, she trusted them the least. Around Yasha, she still struggled to function properly, while Molly at least had the decency to have just as much of a ‘fuck you’ attitude as she did. At least he didn’t pretend to be more likeable than he was.

But Caleb?

She couldn’t get a clear read on him. She was fairly sure that he was hiding something – but then again, so was she, said the voice in the back of her mind – but she just didn’t care. As long as it didn’t come to bite them in the ass, she thought.

However, when the wizard offered to take the first guard duty of the night on his own, the monk decided that she didn’t quite trust him to keep them safe. Sure, he had fought alongside them and had put his own life on the line to defend theirs, but anyone could do that. Besides, he still had that look in his eyes that said that he was ready to dash away from them at all times.

So as she had gotten comfortable, she rolled over so that her back was turned to him. He had sat down on a log right next to her, the skittering noises of Frumpkin the cat clearly audible to Beau as she pretended to fall asleep. It took the group a while to settle down completely, but it didn’t remain quiet for very long.

At first, she was convinced that there was an owl or any other bird of night making some noises in the surrounding trees, but the longer she listened and the longer she tried to pinpoint the source of the sound, the easier it became to discern. Caleb was humming, as quietly as he could, as not to disturb the rest of the group.

She rolled over a little, so she could see him out of the corners of her eyes and instantly the noise stopped. Caleb glanced over his shoulder, his eyes wide as they reflected the light of the fire that was burning merrily in the middle of the group, terrified that he had woken someone up. Beau settled a little, licked her lips and then let out a deep sigh.

There was the noise of fabric rubbing against other fabric as Caleb’s hands seemed to twist and fidget. He seemed to be nervous still, but as nobody got up and nobody else moved, he decided that everyone must still be asleep and a few minutes later, the humming resumed once again.

Beau recognised the song now: it was a lullaby that her mother had sung during the very early years that she had been alive. It was a faint memory that popped up, one of surprising comfort and, despite her resolution to stay awake, drifted off to sleep.

 

\--+--

 

The first time that Beau witnessed a completely silent Caleb was after they’d fought the manticore, when he had gone somewhere none of them could follow. Though the noises of the battlefield and noises of victory from the rest surrounded them, the wizard didn’t make a single noise. At least not until Molly stormed over to him, slapped him and brought him back to the present.

Afterwards, it seemed that Caleb had gone back to normal.

 

\--+--

 

Caleb was never entirely quiet.

Nott knew this for a fact. Many times, the two of them had curled up together in the woods, the wizard humming until he drifted off to sleep, but even when he was sleeping, he was never entirely quiet. Many times had she sat awake by his side, listening to the noises of him breathing, of him mumbling quietly in his sleep, of his whines and moans that announced a nightmare coming on.

However, the goblin knew that he had gotten a lot better than he used to be. It was the group. There was safety in numbers, as he had said so often, but he truly seemed to believe that. They had been travelling for quite a while now, all together, and over the last few weeks, they had gotten much closer. She had witnessed her boy sit next to Fjord on the cart, almost completely quiet, contently listening to the half-orc’s tale and the noises of the horses in front of them.

At moments like those, she would glow with pride whenever he glanced over to her, to make sure that she was still there, that she was still okay. After being on their own for so long, they knew to keep an eye on each other, even if there were others with them. (The last thing they wanted was to lose one another.) That eye contact and the pride from the goblin was returned with the smallest of smiles from the wizard, but it was more than enough.

Caleb was content and that was all that Nott ever wanted.

 

\--+--

 

Later that evening, when the soft whines escaped the wizard, Nott rushed over, pulling him in for a comforting hug. Caleb clung to her, even in his slumber, desperate to be touch, to have someone hold in. While the noises were oh-so-quiet – the rest of the group would probably not even hear them – they were the ones that broke Nott’s heart.

She would take away the memories that plagued him, if only she could, within a heartbeat.

 

\--+--

 

Caleb was speaking to someone.

Molly, though still groggy from sleep, knew this for a fact. It was what had woken them up, they were sure of it, but Caleb’s voice was quiet and lilting in a language that they didn’t understand. They blinked a few times, licking their lips as they tried to get control over their thoughts again. They were thirsty and needed to pee, but that meant that they would need to get up and snap Caleb out of whatever he was doing.

That was the last thing the purple tiefling wanted to do.

So they laid awake, unmoving, barely blinking, trying to be as quiet as they could possibly be, hoping that they would be able to hold it all for at least a little longer. Caleb’s quiet voice was almost a song as he spoke in the musical language. As they attempted to memorise the wizard’s voice, they must have uttered some sounds, some syllables, because Caleb stopped talking quite abruptly.

“Mollymauk?”

Molly was so tempted to simply roll around, maybe even fake snore in an attempt to get the other to relax so that he would talk again in that language, but they _knew_ for a fact that the wizard knew for sure that they were awake. So they pushed themselves up and turned towards Caleb with a sleepy smile.

“G’mornin’, Mr. Caleb.”

“I do hope I didn’t wake you.” The wizard said, his attention temporarily turned away from their surroundings as he turned as well. “I tried my hardest to remain quiet.”

“I needed to pee.” The blood hunter shrugged with a smile, as they made their way over to the other. As they reached him, they pressed the softest of kisses to the top of his head. “Don’t worry, dearest, you weren’t the only reason I woke up.”

Caleb’s bright blue eyes were shimmering with the light of the fire behind the two of them, but they were, for once, free of any painful memories. The tiefling had learned to recognise it when their wizard was about to leave them in favour of spending some time in the past, but at this particular moment, they should be fine. “Then you should go pee, _mein Liebling.”_

“I should indeed go pee.” They hummed for a moment, as they made sure to keep their voice limited to a whisper. “Would you like some company once I return? Two sets of eyes are better than one.”

Barely needing to consider that offer, Caleb’s face broke open into a smile that they rarely got to see. “I would absolutely love that.”

Disappearing to the woods, out of the wizard’s line of sight, Molly went to relieve themselves against one of the trees. They made sure to listen closely, in case Caleb would resume talking again, but to their disappointment, he didn’t. Debating whether they would bring it up again or not, they barely noticed that they had finished what they were doing. They simply stood there, their ears perked, in the hope of hearing his favourite member of the Mighty Nein speak again.

“Mollymauk?” The wizard called out to him after what felt like an eternity, but it was probably only a few minutes. “Are you okay? You’ve been gone for _ein ganz lange Zeit_ _.”_

Finally realising that they had finished what they were doing, they quietly returned to their wizard, a small frown of confusion between their brows. “What did you say?”

“You were gone for quite a while.” Caleb quickly translated, before patting the spot on the ground right next to him. “I’m sorry for waking you, Mollymauk, but I am also glad that you are awake.”

After sitting down, Molly cuddled gently into their wizard’s side, their tail gently tapping Caleb’s back as they settled. “Who were you talking to when I woke up?”

It was only when Caleb gestured at a small shape that the tiefling realised that Frumpkin was there was well, curled up against the wizard’s other side. While his one hand, the one closest to Molly was messing with his coat, the other was tangled in the familiar’s tabby fur. It was a gentle movement, one that stood in such stark contrast with the gestures he used when fighting, but a type they adored nonetheless.

“I was talking to Frumpkin.” Caleb explained. “Over the years, I’ve learned Sylvan to communicate with my cat in his own language. He responds telepathically, but—I don’t know, it feels… calming.”

“You learned a new language, just to be able to communicate with your _cat_?” Molly’s eyebrows raised. They were definitely surprised by that little fact. “You learned a _dead_ language, just for your cat?”

“Well, it’s not a _dead_ language, the creatures of the fey still speak it. That’s how I learned it.” Caleb’s voice raise caused one of their companions to stir and it was Beau’s voice that broke the conversation between the two of them.

“What the fuck, turtle doves? Go be loud someplace else.”

Molly chuckled softly, before calling out to the monk. “Sleep well, Beauregard.”

She grumbled quietly, but it sounded a remarkable lot like ‘sleep well, you prick’. With a smile, Molly ushered Caleb to bed as he took up the third and last guard duty for the night.

The silence soon surrounded him, only interrupted every so often by Caleb’s soft mumbles, until the sun rose, along with the rest of the group.

 

\--+--

 

Caleb, as he stood over Molly’s grave, mumbled something in a language that none of the Mighty Nein had ever heard before. A single tear was rolling down his cheek as he stood there, staring at the colourful coat that was floating in the wind.

Beau walked over to him, placed a hand on his shoulder and let grief consume her as it already was Caleb.

 

\--+--

 

Ever since Molly’s death, Caleb found himself talking to himself more and more often. Even when Frumpkin wasn’t around, he would just mumble in Sylvan, hoping that his messages would reach the purple tiefling, wherever he was. He knew that they wouldn’t be able to understand them, but he said them anyway.

In fact, he was quite sure that nobody in the group understood the language of the fey, besides him.

Imagine his surprise when Caduceus not only understood, but also replied to him in that same language, the one he had so far only used to talk to his cat and his dead— _friend._

“So, Mr. Caleb.” The firbolg smiled as he spoke in the same language as Caleb, though his accent was a bit rusty from not speaking the language for so long. “Who exactly are you talking to?”

It would be so easy to lie and say that it was Frumpkin, but the cat was currently nowhere in view and so it would be one of the worst lies he’d ever told. After a soft sigh, Caleb glanced up at his new pink friend and shrugged. “Mollymauk, _denke ich_. He always loved it when I spoke in Sylvan and I-I feel closer to him, somehow.”

He was a hundred percent sure that the firbolg would declare him crazy and leave him be – which Caleb honestly wouldn’t mind too much – but once again the cleric seemed to manage to surprise him, this time by putting a hand on his shoulder and squeezing it gently. “Sometimes, the souls of those who left us linger a bit. I think it’s nice.”

Before Caleb could say anything in answer to that, Caduceus continued. “I shall leave you to it then, my friend.” And with two pats on his shoulders, the firbolg was once again gone, as quietly as he had arrived.

For one of the first times in his life, Caleb was absolutely speechless.


End file.
